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The Practice of Magic By: Abe WalkingBear Sanchez |
“Words are magic. The very idea that by making sounds we can paint pictures in the minds of others is magic.
We get to choose whether we practice white or black magic.”
Jack Brightnose
Cree Medicineman
Communications stink. If you don’t believe me ask your
husband/wife, boss, employees, customers or your children. There
are reasons why we do so badly when trying to communicate with others,
and there are simple and effective ways for doing better.
Agreements
In his book, The Four Agreements, Miguel Ruiz, a Toltec nagual (guide) says that every letter and word is based on Agreements (understandings). Once the parties involved in an exchange of words, whether good or bad, understand what is being said an energy is transferred. The better the link and the better the communications; the more energy is transferred.
In business, the flow of positive energy results in a smooth running, efficient and moneymaking operation. Negative energy flow results from the practice of black magic; and in such organizations the left hand doesn’t know what the right hand is doing, much less that it ever existed; and they don’t care.
First Agreement
Ruiz says, “Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Avoid using words against others, or yourself.” This first of the Four Agreements is the hardest to keep. We can’t take back ill chosen words and once spoken, negative energy is transferred.
When a parent says something negative to a child, it may take 10, 100 or 1000 positive words / remarks to compensate for the harm done. The same holds true for a boss and employee. Even more damaging and destructive is negative self speak.
The Toltecs call the voices in our minds “allies”, the Middle Eastern guys refer to them as “gods”. Of all the voices, the loudest and clearest is our own. The thing about all humans is that we're flawed; we're going to screw-up. Ruiz says that humans are the only form of life on Earth that punish themselves over and over again for the same mistake. Even worse we punish those we work / live with over and over again for their mistakes.
Think of glitches, misunderstandings, bad judgments and screw-ups as tuition. The idea being to learn from the past, to grow and move on. Don’t beat up on yourself; there are plenty of people out there willing to do it for you, for free.
They say, “talk is cheap” and that’s right; positive talk is a heck of a lot cheaper than high customer / employee / wife / husband turnover. Talk is cheaper than inefficient operations.
When’s the last time you picked up the phone (no email) and called your customers, vendors, staff, boss, husband, wife, parents or kids and said a simple thank you? A positive energy transfer.
The Second Agreement
“Don’t take anything personally.” According to Ruiz, “what others say or do is a projection of their own reality.”
For a business to do its best it must learn to deal with the customers’ realities. Good sales guys ask questions and then shut up and listen. They’re listening for the customer’s “hot button”; those things that define the customers’ view of the need or desire. The most powerful words (sales presentation) are those that reflect the customer’s inner voice (answers to questions).
Avoid making a big deal over every little thing. Others don’t have to be wrong in order for you to be right. Ruiz says, “taking things personally is like taking a poison.”
The Third Agreement
“Don’t make assumptions.” The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they’re the truth. "Have the courage to ask questions."
You need to communicate as clearly as possible to avoid creating “drama” (inefficiencies) and sadness (ill will). If you’re not sure about something, ask before you act. Don’t be afraid of asking for what you want, it’s your right. Just don’t forget that it’s the other person’s right to say no.
The time taken to clarify understandings can bring about a transformation in your business / life. Positive VS negative energy transfer.
The Forth Agreement
“Always do your best. Your best is going to change from time to time. Under any circumstances do your best and you’ll avoid self judgment, self abuse and regret.”
We all slip and use words to hurt others and ourselves. We will take things personally and make assumptions that lead to “drama”; but as long as we acknowledge our shortcomings we're on the right track.
Heaven or Hell
"Man knows himself completely until he makes his first
compromise.
The more he compromises the more he takes in that which is not
him.
Soon he forget who or what he is. He becomes his name
rather
than receiving the name that is him."
old First American saying
In business / life we create our own “dream heaven” or “dream hell.” Sometimes others will try to pull us into their “dream hell”; we have to understand where they’re coming from and resist to avoid being drawn in.
Right Brain and the Other Right Brain
Scientists think humans became modern man about 100,000 – 150,000 years ago. The ability to speak was essential to survival in a hunting and gathering society. As the use of language expanded our knowledge base grew. Business to a large extent is all about communications. The practical use of knowledge.
Summary
Words often define us and our organizations because they lead to actions. Ghandi wrote “guard your thoughts because they will effect your words, guard your words because they will effect your actions, guard your actions because they will determine your character, guard your character because it will determine your destiny.”
The first line in the gospel according to St. John, “In the beginning was the word, and the word was with God, and the word was God.”
Humans are fairly new and inefficient at this communication thing, but with practice we can become better. Who knows, someday we may be able to read other peoples' minds, like Mr. Spock . . . wait a minute, that may not be such a good idea.
My thanks to Rick (Hawk Who Paints The Sky) Martin for sending me a
copy of The Four Agreements.
Footnote: Jack Brightnose passed on in 2001, he is remembered.
Mitakuye Oyasin. (We are all related)
Download in Word (.doc) format
The Author
Abe WalkingBear Sanchez is an International Speaker / Trainer on the subject of cash flow / sales enhancement and business knowledge organization and use. Founder and President of www.armg-usa.com , Abe also sits on the board of www.BestBizways.com Inc.
TEC (The Executive Committee), "Inc." Magazine Annual Business Conference, CU (Denver), CSU (Ft. Collins), IBM, NASFT, PEI, BCFM, RAB, STAFDA, WIMA, ISD, Pet Industry Distributors Assn., Rain Bird, Winroc, Johnstone Supply, Able Distributing, Evergreen Marketing Group, Southern Wholesalers Assn., Touchstone/2000 Software are but a few of the groups, schools, companies and associations for whom Abe has conducted programs.
Abe can be reached through:
A/R Management Group, Inc.
P.O. Box 457, Canon City, CO 81215
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